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2. FOOTBALL offers the world clichés; RUGBY produces facial deformity; HOCKEY provides an acceptable outlet for psychotic violence; CRICKET alone breeds myths... More quotes here.


Monday mornings are a lot more enjoyable when you win: Balham Roamers 5 June 2005 (Season: 2005)
Report by: Elvis FKA Ginger

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It's been a year of sporting anomalies; unfancied Greece won Euro 2004, the GB men's 4x100 relay team won the Olympic gold (some achievement with a stoned anchorman - he must have a seen someone waving a Mars Bar in the crowd), Wales won the Grand Slam with a team of hairdressers, an unknown so unknown I can't remember his name won the World Snooker championship and, most unbelievably of all, AC Milan made the European Cup final. Thankfully in that last instance, common sense prevailed and the better team won on the day, although I thought an upset was on the cards when that Ukrainian numpty managed to get clear through at the end. Anyway, in this year of sporting miracles, Salix has made their own contribution, winning 4 on the trot for the first time since Charlie was captain and neckerchiefs were fashionable throughout the land.

And so to the match itself. Following in the footsteps of great captains before him, Capn German lost the toss and we were put in to field. A good spell from our opening bowlers kept the runs down and yielded a couple of wickets, most notable of which was a nick behind ably taken by Tony off Roger's bowling, only 4 balls after Tony had told Roger that it was about time a catch came through. Thereafter momentum swung back and forth; the Roamers have batting in depth and spanked the ball around the park, assisted in no small part by some fairly poor Salix fielding, but the odd wicket here and there restricted them to 125 for 8 with not very many overs left. Unfortunately Balham's no.9 is a bit better than our no.9 (much though it hurts to write) and he played a fine late innings to take them to a reasonable total of 177 off the 35 overs. Charlie had bowled well at the end and was unlucky not to pick up a couple more wickets and the German bowled a gem of a first over before letting the more erratic side of his game came to the legside wide fore.

A competitive target, but there's a certain amount of confidence about Salix at the moment, possibly derived from early season success, possibly derived from cocaine addiction (Ed speak for yourself, I'm a lager man myself) and there was a general feeling that we could knock off the 5 an over required. We started slowly, the Nurdler and Daveski building a solid partnership that eventually led to the latter's highest score in Salix colours, a deftly played 43. Charlie came and went without troubling the scorers, as did Raj, and Rog ran himself out for 1 in true Salix comedy fashion. It looked like the familiar middle order collapse; but this is the new improved Salix with extra winning power. New Ginge, neighbour of Ginge kept things ticking over, including a cracking straight six, before Tinker stepped up to deliver the killing blows. A couple of beautifully bludgeoned fours brought the run rate back down and enabled the German, plugging away manfully throughout, to hit the winning runs. The Chancellor would be the first to admit that he's not quite in top nick at the moment, but special mention has to be made of the two sixes he hit, one onto the sports hall roof and the other over the long boundary towards the pavilion.

Thanks to Balham, a good bunch of blokes who probably would have won on any other day. However, the force is with us and we've gone from what I described on the pre-season tour as the "best dressed shit team in London" (I think that should be on the quotes page, btw Editor) (Ed: It's hardly Tennyson is it?) , to a team that looks good and plays passably. As someone said after the match yesterday, Monday mornings are a lot more enjoyable when you win.

Salix CC versus Balham Roamers at Glaxo on 05-06-2005(35 Over Game)
Salix CC (batting second)181for 6off33.3overs Match Won
Balham Roamers177for 8off35overs
NoPlayerScoreHow Out
1.Dominic Spillane15Caught
2.Dave Henig43LBW
3.Charlie Hewitt0Caught
4.Andy Rayner39Not Out
5.Rajeev Sanwalka0LBW
6.Roger Heaton1Run Out
7.Stuart Lumsden22Caught
8.Graham Nannery14Not Out
9.Mike Ellis0Did Not Bat
10.Tony Fletcher0Did Not Bat
11.Steve Jacobs0Did Not Bat
1.Steve Jacobs711427.0021.002.00
2.Mike Ellis7126126.0042.003.71
3.Stuart Lumsden40330--8.25
4.Charlie Hewitt7033216.5021.004.71
5.Andy Rayner3019119.0018.006.33
6.Roger Heaton7023123.0042.003.29
Dominic Spillane2catches
Tony Fletcher1catch
Roger Heaton1catch
Stuart Lumsden1catch
Graham Nannery1catch
Steve Jacobs1drop
Stuart Lumsden1drop
Graham Nannery1drop

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