1. Cricket is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy (Stephen Fry)
2. FOOTBALL offers the world clichés; RUGBY produces facial deformity; HOCKEY provides an acceptable outlet for psychotic violence; CRICKET alone breeds myths... More quotes here.


Tough day: Whalers 30 July 2006 (Season: 2006)
Report by: the Direktor, Not the owner of a Decent Thesaurus

Match Report: Click here to add your own comment  |  See all comments

Personally I knew it was going to be a tough day as I watched the Whalers blatantly getting several over on us by a: arriving on time, b: warming up and C: lending us a spare fielder for the whole of our session. Poor Chazza meanwhile was stuck for 4 hours in a huge jam on the M3 so he probably had the best day of all the Salix players. In a game where Elvis's boyz were totally outclassed it went like this:

Lost toss


Bowling attack ok ish against great batting Catching v good, go to top of the class Flossie and Elvis

Fielding and stopping quick singles: woeful

Tea: a fairly good tea this week including butter for the scones and some smoked salmon. Things are looking up on the gastronomic front for sure


Batting: please select your own synonyms from a list including totally woeful, absolutely woeful, excruciatingly woeful; rubbish, good grief and "I'm sorry I ran SteveO out" but frankly I was hoping a guy with a Taser would appear to us out of our collective misery

Extras: Take a look at the scorebook

If you rearrange these well-known phrase 'Headlight Rabbit' and insert "opponent quality and Gentlemanly", 'Swing Wild' and 'Collapse Order Total' you'll get the idea' Less a blip and more a tank trap on our upward path. Still onwards etc...

PS As you might know, the Whalers CC went to Sri Lanka this year and raised a load of money to help people out there: Here's a summary from Adam:

It is a while since we returned from our cricketing endeavours in Sri Lanka. However, I thought you may be interested to hear about our second donation as below. So you all helped raise £7K which was all handed over when we were out there (see pictures and report on our website www.whalerscc.org.uk) We have now donated a further £4.3K which has been spent as below. We have a further £1.6K to follow along with gift aid on our original £7K. So our total funds raised will be in the region of £15K, which is a great legacy for our cricket club.

Salix CC versus Whalers at Glaxo on 30-07-2006(35 Over Game)
Salix CC (batting second)91for 9off25overs Match Lost
Whalers220for 7off35overs
NoPlayerScoreHow Out
1.Ben Shaw20Caught
2.Stuart Lumsden0Caught
3.Wayne Campbell16Bowled
4.Mark Rickman12Caught
5.Richard Kluth2LBW
6.Roger Heaton3Bowled
7.Ollie Carter0Caught
8.Mike Ellis3Caught
9.Tony Fletcher0Not Out
10.Steve Jacobs0Run Out
1.Steve Jacobs7046146.0042.006.57
2.Stuart Lumsden70300--4.29
3.Wayne Campbell7024212.0021.003.43
4.Mike Ellis5040220.0015.008.00
5.Roger Heaton30250--8.33
6.Tony Fletcher30310--10.33
7.Mark Rickman3021210.509.007.00
Mike Ellis1catch
Richard Kluth1catch
Ben Shaw1catch

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