1. Cricket is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy (Stephen Fry)
2. FOOTBALL offers the world clichés; RUGBY produces facial deformity; HOCKEY provides an acceptable outlet for psychotic violence; CRICKET alone breeds myths... More quotes here.


Middle order, top class!: Demijohns 22 Jun 2008 (Season: 2008)
Report by: Comedy bowler

Match Report: Click here to add your own comment  |  See all comments

The Toffs disport the latest in casual about townwear
And so to Oxford for the game vs the DJS, who are roughly 1/3 Salixite in makeup (ie the Toff gene part of our largely middle class DNA).

We either won or lost the toss (who knows, I was busy winning a cherry stone spitting contest – my competitors, a woman and child, were rubbish) and batted first in what was declaration game, not a format with which we are frankly that familiar. Tinker and the Nurdler took us slowly toward 30 something as Big Rog laboured at one end and Rupert the other. Some fine opening bowling, esp the one that saw President Ex Captain Ben out for a golden. But Rupert sprained his ankle and Rog was a touch winded and then, as the sun shone and the over rate fell way below that for which you would get fined in league game, the middle order whacked on, with the Russet one hitting his largest ever post-puberty score.

After tea Capn Padders allowed a little more whacking and then put the DJs in for what was to turn out to be 42 overs. A little whacking from the DJs openers was rapidly followed by shutting up shop against the pace of Jesus, Padders and Vice Captain Angry et al, so it was time for the comedy bowlers to be brought on and thusly several DJs were out to what might loosely be termed inadvisable shots and run outs.

Quote of the day from our own Toff, “Yes, No, F*ck… Boll*cks” sort of summed it up. Comedy bowling over, we resumed the normal attack and trotted in to a draw in the deepening gloom. Not so many incidents of note, although the Dazzler did have a fingernail removed whilst dropping one off the Directors bowling and Mrs Dazzler proved very adept at doing the scoring. A new career beckons there. Matt had brought a huge crowd of his own to cheer him on too.

So, another game another win, sorry draw, and now the Tour.

PS the Collingwood memorial shirt that Ben had that was too big for him, proved too small for me and Tink but fitted the Rog-man a treat.

Salix CC versus Demijohns at Wadham College Oxford on 22-06-2008(35 Over Game)
Salix CC (batting second)218for 5off41overs Match Drawn
Demijohns200for 7off42overs
NoPlayerScoreHow Out
1.Dominic Spillane17Run Out
2.Graham Nannery18Bowled
3.Ben Shaw0Bowled
4.Darren Gavigan36Caught & Bowled
5.Christy Kulasingam46Bowled
6.Stuart Lumsden80Not Out
7.Matthew Parratt4Not Out
8.Alastair Davidson0Did Not Bat
9.David Padmore0Did Not Bat
10.Tony Fletcher0Did Not Bat
11.Daoud Shanvare0Did Not Bat
1.Alastair Davidson104300--3.00
2.David Padmore7133133.0042.004.71
3.Stuart Lumsden841226.0024.001.50
4.Daoud Shanvare4010110.0024.002.50
5.Matthew Parratt3025125.0018.008.33
6.Tony Fletcher5044144.0030.008.80
7.Christy Kulasingam30290--9.67
8.Graham Nannery2014114.0012.007.00
David Padmore1catch
Matthew Parratt1catch
Dominic Spillane1catch
Darren Gavigan1drop
David Padmore1drop

92-year-old Fletch offers advice from first slip

Comments, if any, are shown below: Click here to add your own comment

The Nurdler left the following remarks on 24th June 2008

I'm just astonished that when the skipper was looking for joke bowling, he didn't ask me to have a go. My right arm buffet bowling is as good/bad as anyone's!

ck1 left the following remarks on 23rd June 2008

After that torrid performance with the ball, CK1 is contemplating retiring from bowling to focus fully on reinventing himself as a top order batter.

Oh, the visions of switch-hitting glory... IPL / CL cashflow... champagne showers...

dazzler left the following remarks on 23rd June 2008

In case anyone is interested the finger has gone a lovely shade of deepest purple, but it's probably not gruesome enough for inclusion on the injuries page. Serves me right though really; glamorous stops at deep square leg are all well and good but catches win matches.

Old Bloke left the following remarks on 23rd June 2008

Big thanks to Baldrick who has taken time out of his work to learn how update the website for us and done this game. It's not trivial to make sure Vice Captain Angry's mum gets the news about her Russett-haired son's performance on the pitch in a timely fashion when logging on for Salix news

Big up to Podge too, who wrote the thing in the first place too and many people find it useful. Just yesterday a punter searching Google for Gay bars in Eymet (where we went for our 2002 tour) was no doubt delighted to find a recommendation for the Bar Le Mous - the only after hours drinking establishment in the town. Public service, that’s our remit