1. Cricket is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy (Stephen Fry)
2. FOOTBALL offers the world clichés; RUGBY produces facial deformity; HOCKEY provides an acceptable outlet for psychotic violence; CRICKET alone breeds myths... More quotes here.


 

Mullered!: vs Fawe Park CC 01 Jul 2012 (Season: 2012)
Report by: YM

Match Report: Click here to add your own comment  |  See all comments


Our frail hero
When you looked into the eye of Medusa you turned to stone. And such it was that Salix CC looked into the sign that said Roehampton Playing Fields and turned into men with 2 left feet who could not play cricket. The lads from Fawe Park road were as fun as ever to play, and although the wicket was a seriously up and down one, it was a jolly game and one that was the same for both teams.

Salix actually got off to a reasonable start with Fawe Park 88 for 6 but then Medusa smiled and it all went totally t#ts up. The first item of note was Smutmeister taking a superb catch from a skier. Sadly this ripped the webbing in his delicate hands (ones that are strangers to manual labour of course) and it was off to A&E for 6 stitches. And so we were ten. Swords then dropped a total sitter and whilst he generously gave me permission to headline this game "Swords loses match for Salix" this would be both totally untrue and unfair to boot. Yes, the chap he dropped on 3 went on to make a ton, but who amongst us hasn't dropped a sitter at sometime? And Payts junior got carted around something rotten, but again, who hasn't? I know I have. Anyhow this was all as nothing compared to our batting.

After an excellent tea our openers both departed for ducks. CK and MattMark then did a tiny little bit of ship steadying, but after that it was downhill faster than Jean Claude Killy ever managed and so it is a kindness to draw a veil over it all (my abysmal effort included) .

As mentioned at the top of the report it's always fun playing Fawe Park who are a relatively new opponent to us and the game was played in an excellent spirit. Plus there is the added bonus of some new records: Our fifth worst low score ever. A new bowler on the all time worst list. However on the plus side, there is the bonus in that our database doesn’t easily allow me to work out if this was our biggest defeat ever. And of course Smutty enters our famous hall of injuries.

And on that note I'd say never mind, there's always next week, but its been raining so much this summer you wonder if next week will be in September? And finally if anyone has Perseus on speed dial, we might need him next time this happens.

BTW some excellent bowling from the Fawe Park lads, but I'll let them put that up in their match report

Salix CC versus Fawe Park CC at Roehampton Playing Fields on 01-07-2012(40 Over Game)
Salix CC (batting second)68for 9off24overs Match Lost
Fawe Park CC254for 9off40overs
NoPlayerScoreHow Out
1.Tim Payton0Bowled
2.David Padmore0Caught
3.Mark Jolly12Bowled
4.Christy Kulasingam14Bowled
5.Andy Foster1Bowled
6.Stuart Lumsden0Bowled
7.Matt Payton22Not Out
8.Tony Fletcher3Bowled
9.Dominic Spillane2Bowled
10.Steve Jacobs4Caught
11.Tim Collins0Did Not Bat
Extras10
Total68
No.PlayerOversMaidensRunsWicketsAveSREcon
1.Steve Jacobs8145315.0016.005.62
2.David Padmore813448.5012.004.25
3.Christy Kulasingam81360--4.50
4.Stuart Lumsden8324124.0048.003.00
5.Matt Payton6062162.0036.0010.33
6.Andy Foster10150--15.00
7.Mark Jolly10150--15.00
Tim Collins1catch
Stuart Lumsden1catch
Andy Foster1drop
David Padmore1drop
Tim Payton1drop
Matt Payton1drop


Comments, if any, are shown below: Click here to add your own comment

YM left the following remarks on 3rd July 2012

Fixed the link SteveO and re Smutties comment, I am not a medical doctor so don't go reporting me to the GMC, but that said, I do a cheap line in Botox for the elderly cricketer.


Steve-o left the following remarks on 2nd July 2012

If you hit the link to the report from the 2012 page you go to the Quokkas match report, link on the home page works. Comment on the game? We had a bad day at the office.


tim left the following remarks on 2nd July 2012

thanks for the surgery tony...well at least england and spain won. see you all next week i hope...