1. Cricket is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy (Stephen Fry)
2. FOOTBALL offers the world clichés; RUGBY produces facial deformity; HOCKEY provides an acceptable outlet for psychotic violence; CRICKET alone breeds myths... More quotes here.


Nine long years..: vs Jordans Taverners (Seer Green) 02 Sep 2012 (Season: 2012)
Report by: Elvis

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In recent seasons the visit to Seer Green has proved a graveyard for any late season Salix optimism, with only the distant memory of our erstwhile meterosexual mascot Podge's failure to score a ton by four runs in his final game for the club giving your correspondent any solace as he pens his reports. This year optimism has been thin on the ground, with last week's victory masking a season littered with defeats amongst the abandonments; and so we arrived for our match with Jordans Taverners with a prevailing sense not of possible victory, but of damage limitation in an inevitable loss.

Initially Taverners followed the script, seeing off our opening bowlers and when Bad-Mo spilt a couple of decent chances off CK1 it appeared as though we were playing our tragic part to perfection. Our new recruit, Teen Wolf, is, however, unsullied by such negativity and after a dangerous looking first over struck in his second, pegging back one of Taverners opener's off stump with a ball that skidded through whilst swinging away beautifully. The other opener followed shortly thereafter, dismissed in similar fashion and numbers three and four were also clean bowled with Bad-Mo in on the act for one of them, Teen Wolf picking up his third. After the rarity of opening the bowling, your correspondent was brought back into the attack to give Teen Wolf a breather and having placed The Nurdler out on the boundary at Long On, I for once bowled a ball that enticed the batsman to sky one that the Nurdler ably snaffled. Proving that miracles do happen, the trick was repeated the following over with the Nurdler taking an even harder chance that most likely would have gone for six if it hadn't been held. Taverner's number 8 timed a few lusty blows before being bowled by one that actually turned and it was left to Teen Wolf to mop up the tail, which he did with alacrity, finishing the day with 6-25; all of them were clean bowled.

With Taverner's dismissed inside 30 overs of a 40 over game, Salix went out to bat 10 overs before tea, chasing a target of 142 that felt both simultaneously achievable and daunting. The latter sense was only enhanced by some excellent Taverner's bowling and Salix did well to make it through to tea with only the loss of Daveski, dollying one up to square leg in the 5th over. After the usual excellent tea, featuring a delicious home-made Victoria Sponge, CK1 and Young Spillane continued to play carefully. With overs on our side they were able to play out the opening bowlers and then go on the attack with the first change, CK1 thence smiting 22 in one over. Although both fell eventually they had lain a superb foundation upon which firstly Teen Wolf and then Bad-Mo were able to take advantage. When the former was dismissed, bowled round his legs, it was left to the Smutmeister to ease the rest of the team's nerves with a few lusty blows to the boundary and Bad-Mo sealed the win in the 37th over with a looping drive to mid-off that evaded the fielder in close to prevent the single.

A first win in 9 years for Salix at Seer Green and it felt like a welcome tonic to the season's woes, as though that one win has made up for so much lost and so much missed. A big thank you to Jordans Taverners who as usual were excellent hosts and good spirited competition, as friendly in defeat as they have serially been in victory.

Salix CC versus Jordans Taverners (Seer Green) at Seer Green on 02-09-2012(40 Over Game)
Salix CC (batting second)143for 5off37overs Match Won
Jordans Taverners (Seer Green)142all outoff29.4overs
NoPlayerScoreHow Out
1.Dave Henig1Caught
2.Darren Gavigan26Caught
3.Christy Kulasingam46Caught
4.Tony Fletcher6Bowled
5.Andy Spurr26Bowled
6.David Padmore21Not Out
7.Tim Collins13Not Out
8.Dominic Spillane0Did Not Bat
9.Mike Ellis0Did Not Bat
10.Cameron Jacobs0Did Not Bat
11.Steve Jacobs0Did Not Bat
1.Steve Jacobs41160--4.00
2.Mike Ellis8136312.0016.004.50
3.Christy Kulasingam40310--7.75
4.Andy Spurr6.402564.176.673.75
5.David Padmore4215115.0024.003.75
6.Cameron Jacobs31120--4.00
Dominic Spillane2catches
David Padmore2drops
Cameron Jacobs1drop
Dominic Spillane1drop

Comments, if any, are shown below: Click here to add your own comment

Nurdler left the following remarks on 4th September 2012

I thought Padders made a pretty decent attempt at two tricky catches - especially the full-length dive. Cam bowled a decent spell with no luck. Probably twice the pace of Jacobs Snr.. Is anyone missing a pair of Kipstra whites? I seem to have acquired a pair after the match.

The Erroneous Writer left the following remarks on 3rd September 2012

Sorry, 5 wins. And yes, out of 10 completed matches that is a decent return for Salix. I'll claim artistic licence with the narrative.

The Writer left the following remarks on 3rd September 2012

I count 4 wins. Tour wins/losses don't credit to your captaincy stats, if that's where you're getting your extra three. Nice try.

crippled CGC left the following remarks on 3rd September 2012

Good performance there chaps. Looks like everybody contributed in some way. Nice to see almost all batsman get some runs too. Bit harsh on the season's performance though Mike - I'd take winning 7 out of 13 completed games almost every season!

YM left the following remarks on 3rd September 2012

As I stare mistily at a cricket life all but gone by and with skills evaporating faster than a boiling beaker of ether, I'd like to congratulate Elvis on overtaking my all wickets second place and Andy on being our best ever wicket taker (both strike rate and averages) and being one of only 5 Salix players to ever get a sixfer.