1. Cricket is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy (Stephen Fry)
2. FOOTBALL offers the world clichés; RUGBY produces facial deformity; HOCKEY provides an acceptable outlet for psychotic violence; CRICKET alone breeds myths... More quotes here.


Salix go back to university: In which our heroes learn some hard lessons: vs Demijohns 25 Jun 2017 (Season: 2017)
Report by: Monty Red Barron

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The Teams
There was more than the usual excitement for our annual fixture against the Demijohns, given that last year rain had prevented play and left Salix stranded in a Wetherspoons with only discussions of the recent Brexit vote to keep us entertained. However, even if the forecast was clear, clouds of a different type metaphorically gathered over the team on Saturday evening, with the news that our bold captain had fallen victim to a stray ball whilst batting for another side (an Ellis-ism). To protect readers of a delicate disposition I will not go into details, suffice to say that the great CK would not be playing on Sunday (or indeed for the rest of the summer). Panic ensued, Salix players of all types wept, prayed and recited "Captain my captain" until told to stop it by better halves.

Nevertheless the Whalers, another old rival, kindly lent us the excellent Geoff (of whom more will be said), and the game got underway.

Playing in a timed format (which placed us at a serious disadvantage, as few of our team know how to use a watch), the DJs batted first. A stunning catch in the first over (take a bow Geoff) removed one of the openers. Thereafter some disciplined bowling kept the score rate low. Expectations were that the DJs would want 200+ on the board before putting Salix in and whilst their progress towards that total seemed steady it was (initially) not rapid. Wickets fell at an amiable pace (Bala, Elvis, Paddlers* and Arsey each taking one). Dills was again the pick of the bowlers, picking up three lovely wickets. Admittedly he was a tad on the pricey side("some balls are better than others" as the man himself philosophically concluded), but much of that damage was done in the final couple of overs. The economy was excellent from Geoff (take another bow) and Bala, with Ellis and Darling also keeping it economical.

As the clock drifted towards 4pm thoughts turned to a declaration (or more precisely tea, which was, as ever, excellent). It really is punishing in a timed day not knowing when you can make merry with the pizza and scones. Dills took a second wicket and with the total around 160 things seemed to be going our way. However Dills's last dismissal had unintended consequences. Already at the crease was Ollie, batsman and doctor extraordinaire. He was joined by Captain Ross, a hurricane sent by the Gods to deliver runs unto the DJs. The oppo, having taken more than 30 overs to accrue 160 runs , suddenly accelerated with this dynamic batting duo and pushed the score 198 in the next three. Tuffers, with the courage of the Captain, bravely attempted to dazzle them with spin, and watched his averages disappear as he did so.

Tea was called a little after 4, with the boys back out for the chase at half past. One hour to bat with 20 overs thereafter.

Time was on our side, but talent less so. With our batting on the short side we thought slow and steady was the way forward, the lure of the draw in our minds. To that end Darling and (unusually) Monty went into bat with orders to keep it simple. Darling started adding a few runs whilst at the other end Monty did an impression of a man who has bought a book on batting but only gotten as far as the chapter on how to block them out. "He can't be playing for the draw from the second over!" one the of the slips remarked. In familiar form batsmen came and went. 9 of 11 didn't make it to double figures. The standout man was Geoff (you're just showing off now) who made a very nice 63. When he perished all hope of victory disappeared but the draw still looked possible. Before the game Yesterday's Man had predicted that he and The Nurdler would have to see us home and so it very nearly proved. Tension built and the tail held out, imperiously declining any suggestion that they should run between the wickets, and with a few overs to go some believed we might escape, only to see a good ball straighten on YM and clip his leg-stump.

And so it ended, another good game and another gallant loss. Thanks as ever to our sporting oppo for a great day out and to Geoff for reminding us how cricket should be played.

* Paddlers might have had another were it not for Monty (aka the Red Barron aka Dribbler) busy talking to the square leg umpire when the nut came his way.

Salix CC versus Demijohns at St Johns Oxford on 25-06-2017(Timed Game)
Salix CC (batting second)169all outoff39overs Match Lost
Demijohns198for 7off36overs dec
NoPlayerScoreHow Out
1.Adam Darling24Caught
2.Oliver Ferrari4LBW
3.David Padmore7Caught
4.Geoff Judd63Caught
5.Balakalyan Kakumanu0Bowled
6.Mike Ellis0Run Out
7.Rob Dean4LBW
8.Irwin Sarif0Bowled
9.Dillan Unadkat7LBW
10.Tony Fletcher7Bowled
11.Dominic Spillane8Not Out
1.Geoff Judd51170--3.40
2.Balakalyan Kakumanu5117117.0030.003.40
3.David Padmore8151151.0048.006.38
4.Mike Ellis6024124.0036.004.00
5.Adam Darling5021121.0030.004.20
6.Dillan Unadkat7063321.0014.009.00
Geoff Judd1catch
Dillan Unadkat1catch
Geoff Judd1drop

Comments, if any, are shown below: Click here to add your own comment

Bison left the following remarks on 28th June 2017

A pleasure to see you as always gents. Next year I'll try to get out to someone other than Mike.